.Yada,yada,yada.

.back to school.

2012-01-29T01:58:00.001+08:00

I wish I could be transported to all these pretty places I see on the Internet by just a touch of the finger. Wouldn’t that be grand? To be able to just touch the screen at any particular photo and instantly be transported to another place for just a little while, to be able to just sit and breathe in the air or lie by the water and not have to think or plan or worry or stress over things that ultimately we really have no control over anyway?

And once we’re ready, we can just head back to our mess of a world.

For some, it’s the things they can hold, things they can wear, things they can show,
things things things.

For me, it’s the people I can keep,
and the places I want to be in.

Enough said here.

nothing good on tv, so here i am.

2012-01-22T22:38:00.002+08:00

1.to date,It has been two 19 days (including saturdays and sundays)!
2.Not even going to pretend. Teaching Year 2 kids is a bit tiring.
3.Patience is the key.
4.shouting and yelling will not help much.
5.Still trying to remember all their names. Because I want to.
6.Been using the disciplinary teacher's name an awful lot.
7.Have understood that class right after P.E and recess requires more attention-grabbing activities.
8.They love songs very much.
9.I miss teaching older kids.
10.I love calling out their names. They have very nice names.
11.I love how they look at me.
12.I love when they say "cikgu cantik"
13.Obviously, I couldn't continue to be mad at them when they look at me with those innocent eyes.
14.I'm teaching the last class of year 2 and i love them
15.these are the kids that i think needed help from me the most.
16.though at times i feel like giving up.
17.but please ya Allah, lembutkanlah hati mereka untuk menerima apa yang aku ajarkan.

How are you fellow teachers doing?I hope our second year of teaching will be great!Anyways, hope it's not too late to wish all of you GOOD LUCK! :D

.it's the weekend baby.

2012-01-06T20:57:00.004+08:00

the tittle says it all, yup it's the weekend. fuh...the weekend is finally here. though we only had 3 days of school, it feels like a long week.
i'm teaching Year two english (i'm so clueless and blur)and Dunia seni Visual.
Talk about being creative huh? i'm sooooo not creative. God help me.
i have a feeling that this year is going to be a tough year for me.
what's with all the jawatan given to you because you're single and you don't have any other commitments.
WRONG!
i do have commitments and other stuffs to do. finding Mr. Right is one of the"commitments" =P
hopefully this year will be better for all of us, Insyallah!
so, gonna enjoy my weekend.
movie marathon, jom!
enjoy you weekend gorgeous people!=D

new, baru

2012-01-01T00:00:00.001+08:00

it's new year!Happy new year everyone!

Now, how do I rate the year so far? Lemme See....

The beginning was quite crappy. The middle was filled to the brim with stress. The end..is totally crappy too. :P

I do hope 2012 brings forth better memories and is jam packed with LOVE, new experiences, different places and people, a new sense of motivation, tons of hard hard work that pays of really well and of course plenty of FUN.

I do hope all the stress I've been feeling this year will just mean that the happiness that succeeds it is sweeter.

Actually, I think if you think of the good times more than the bad, I'm sure you'd think the whole year was pretty good overall. So I guess I should concentrate on those hearty laughs with my sweethearts, all the dates with my friends,girlfriends, all the geeky things I've discovered, all the new friends I've made, all my accomplishments and all the hugs I've collected. :D

I want to find myself next year. Would you like to join me?

=D

2011-12-25T00:17:00.002+08:00

my wishlist:

To finally figure out what I'm meant to do in life.
To figure out what i want in life.
To travel the world.
To always strive for the best in everything i do.
To appreciate people around me and people who love me.
To eat anything without gaining ungodly amounts of weight.
To get my happily ever after.
=D

current obsession

2011-12-07T23:25:00.005+08:00

In case you’re wondering how I’m spending my holidays after almost a year of hard work, well currently I’m obsessed with the K-pop. Yes, SNSD is my favorite group. And CN Blue is my favorite band. Jung Yong Hwa, can you please marry me, already? =P owh, incase you’re wondering, Jung Yung Hwa is the emotional leader of CN Blue.this is him

how can you NOT fall for him, kan?
Can’t believe myself that I’m sooooo into K-Pop these days. I even watch Music core every Friday evening without miss.

And currently I’m watching a Korea Drama series too. and have not been watching Gossip Girl, The Vampire diaries, Criminal Minds, Glee and the list goes on. everyday, it's Korean.Korean drama and korean song.
allkpop and soompi are my favourite gossip blog( for korean celebrities). not ohbulan and beautiful nara anymore.

Owh, if you ask me what the new songs are these days? I have no answer to that. But let me try to guess, Adele “Someone like me”, no? or are there any newer songs other than Adele?

Owh, got to get back to the drama.

Till later
=D

.teaching.

2011-12-01T17:40:00.007+08:00

so, as a teacher, we are not just teaching. there are loads of clerical work that we have to do. and yes,it's part and parcel of being a teacher.
and my school has been kind enough to ask me to be in charge of all the performances, especially dance performances for this year. i was lucky enough coz i just have to train the kids and find suitable songs for the performances. the costumes, make up are all provided. tapi, siapa tahukan, ajar budak menari sangat susah.especially when they cannot follow the steps. but it was a good experience though. and i really enjoyed training the kids.
so, here are the vids. enjoy it!
the first video was during Hari Kanak-Kanak.they were my standard 3 students.

the dancers and TeacherFad.
and this second video was during hari Anugerah Cemerlang.they were standard 4, 5 and 6 girls.

bolehlah for an amateur like me,kan?=D

Awal Muharram

2011-11-27T15:53:00.002+08:00

I have flaws, many.

Ain't those flaws make me, we different? I'm differ because of the imperfections I embraced.

Been living with it for years and for begging it to go away was seemingly busted. I am me. Have always been and will always be.

I wonder if time has changed the way you see me. Kadang-kadang kan, you have to realize that something that is so perfect is not always what you need.
that's that.

Salam Awal Muharram.

Praise to Allah for everything HE's blessed us with in the past. My wish for us is simple, that may we be better than we were last year. A better son/daughter, better brother/sister, and so on and so forth. GOD bless us all insyaAllah.

♥ :)

.september it is.

2011-09-16T23:41:00.007+08:00

first of all, i would like to say, happy birthday, Malaysia!
we we still continue to live in peace and harmony!
as i've mentioned in my previous post, i did go to the National Zoo. and since we are allowed to bring our plus one, i dragged my sister with me.
it was the first time i let my whole school to see my sister, before this i'm not really keen of showing my family to my colleagues, but, i think its a good thing though. let the people see my sister. after all, i'm so proud to have a twin!=P

so, here are the pictures.
and i had fun!=D

*faz*

*Mr & Mrs Hippo*

*Jump*

*MOI*

*my kids*

.lil update.

2011-09-14T23:37:00.007+08:00

to date, it has been 7 months and 7 days.
i never really show ur my workstation/where the lesson planning and marking endless students works happen, right?
so, here it is.

*the cabinet where i put all to books from 4 classes that are to be marked*

*my work station,i shared it with a morning teacher.

*the other side of the teacher's room*

*the other side of the teacher's room*

p/s:yes, i'm back!will update soon, very soon.
peace out!
tomorrow i'm going to the National Zoo!=D

2011-08-14T23:16:00.000+08:00

Assalamualaikum everyone.

we are entering the 3rd phase of Ramadhan Mubarak.
Hope everyone is having a wonderful Ramadhan.
bersama-samalah kita meningkatkan amalan kebaikan di bulan yang mula ini.

May Allah bless us all with faith, patience, kindness, strength and forgiveness this Ramadan.

=D

2011-06-29T01:10:00.004+08:00

sorry for the long hiatus. been busy with work.other than that, i have nothing interesting to write. need some inspiration.;D

so, meanwhile, just enjoy the song that i'm currently addicted to.

this one is way better than the original.

i effing LOVE this song!
njoy it!

.11th of May.

2011-05-11T00:19:00.005+08:00

it's 11th of May and its my dearest Hanisah Norizan's birthday.

Dearest Nisah,
Happy Birthday my dear.
Thank you for being my sweetest, my coolest and one of my closest friend.
I couldn't thank you enough for all the things you have done for me.
I really enjoyed our time together, the endless gossip sessions, the-stopping-you-from-shopping-too-much time:P
Being friends with you and getting to know you is one of the best thing in my life. and I thank Allah for that.I'm lucky to have you in my life.
I love everything about you!Really!!!
I hope we will still be friends in years to come.
I will stay with you through and through forever and ever and We will be friends until the end.That is a promise!:D

It's your birthday and i hope you will achieve everything you dreamed and ever wanted in this life.You will, trust me.and wishing you the Endless happiness in returns. and I hope, Allah will grant all you wishes.May Allah bless you with health, wealth and happiness in this world and hereafter!

Happy Birthday again Hanisah.
Love,
Fad Gorgeous!

.May is my month!.

2011-05-08T22:43:00.002+08:00

a tad too late, but i love this song.

in this song, she pushes us not to believe in others about we're not created a perfect one and a beautiful/handsome one. We have our own beauty inside and outside that made us unique to others.we do not have to be someone else.we have to be ourselves.and yes, though i'm a BIG girl, i do believe i am beautiful:P(statement x boleh blah)

It makes me feel like I am the perfect version of myself, and everyone else is perfect in their way too! It brings up memories of how little comments from people have put me down in the past, and this song blows those comments to bits. When it comes to me, I wouldn't want to be anyone else but who I am :)but sometimes i wish and i do wanna be someone else. tapi, seseungguhnya saya mesti bersyukur atas nikmat kurnianNYA.

It reminds us that nobodies perfect and we are fine just the way we are.

I'm sure you got somethings,
You'd like to change about yourself.
But when it comes to me,
I wouldn't wanna be anybody else

i'm a beautiful me. kan?

so this song goes to all the girls out there!:D

.today it's 8th of may.

2011-05-08T22:31:00.003+08:00

Happy Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there! Special wish to the awesome mom in the world! Sabariah Kasim for bringing me up. I love you Mum!I just want to say that you're always my best friend and a confidante. Someone I could count on to my rescue no matter what kind of trouble I managed to get myself into. No matter what happen, I always knew that you're the one person in the whole wide world who would love me. Thank you mom =)

.sweet escape.

2011-04-17T18:44:00.006+08:00

we went snorkeling and we went cycling, we accidently tertidur during ceramahS and we gossiped at night.:P
owh, i couldn't thank you enough JPN for sending us, the newbies to Pangkor.
Most importantly, we had fun.
and insyallah, we're going to apply what we've learned there.we'll try our best!
it was a great escape after two months in school.
looking forward to MAY to meet more of my kesayanganSSS!

.for mak, ayah & me,:D.

2011-04-06T11:02:00.010+08:00

finally, i can proudly call myself a graduate. pemegang ijazah.:D
njoy the pics.
thank you everyone, especially mum and dad for you endless support and uncondtional love, to friends who helped me through the 5 1/2 years (you noe who you are), lecturers, and everyone. i couldn't thank you enough.
:D

As we go on
We remember
All the times we
Had together
And as our lives change
From whatever
We will still be
Friends Forever
(hopefully)
-Graduation,Vitamin C-

it's April,Darling!

2011-04-03T00:08:00.001+08:00

Friday is a long day for me.i only have one class, 2 periods before school ends.Friday is my least favourite day, only 2 periods mean more relief for me. Haish, but at least I get to finish all my work on Friday. Lately it has been raining, bangun pagi2 pun rasa malas, let alone bangun to go to school. Owh, though I’m in the afternoon session, yes, I do wake up early in the morning. The reason is just to do my teaching aids and lesson plansss. Coz when I come home from work, at night, I just watch tv and do nothing. Pagi2 baru kelam-kabut nak buat lesson plan and teaching aids. Haish, ver badlah.
This is my only weekend where I can sleep as much as I want without thinking of the shit load burden of school and ingat cara2 nak bawa kete. Yes, I started my driving class a month ago and I’m still struggling with 3 penjuru. Susahnya!!hope I’ll master it ASAP.so, this week I’m just gonna chill and relax. Owh, tomorrow ada wedding, excited!!:D
You noe what? I think lately I can sense a change in my body. You see, Living in this body, in this girl's body, in my body, is never easy. Some baju kurung that I can still fit in during my college years are left unworn, no longer able to accommodate this figure I'm currently carrying. The pics from the graduation really show how my body has enlarge itself.dang it!
It is no joke, neither a complain, nor a frustration(though kadang2 rasa nak muntahkan balik jer apa yang dimakan). It is a wake up call. i have to do something, quick. Maybe it’s time for me to get some professionals help.
Surrounded by people who are attentive enough to notice a slight change is great. Now that at least I know. Few told the truth, knock me to do something with that. Few keep on teasing. Few has been supportive.
Hence, I call this as perfection. Yes, this is PERFECTION!

pics taken from justjared

i should be doing my lesson plan

2011-03-08T01:15:00.005+08:00

I am writing to dust the rust off my writing skills,(since I've been writing endless lesson plan)not that I have any good writing skills. Haha.and since I joined the Tumblr bandwagon, I find it easier because of the reblog thingy, but it does affect my writing skills.

I become lazier. That is.

But I need to write again.

All in all, everything has been amazing. school has been treating me well, these days. except the kids has been so noisy, so active. and at the end of the day, i lost my voice. fuh bahaya, imagine hilang suara everyday for the next 30 years of your life. My life has been busy, more hectic, new surroundings and new people to mix with, but everything has been good.nothing i can't handle.:P Plus, everything is falling perfectly into its places. I couldn't be more happier.but life as a teacher, sekolah, lesson plans, teaching aids, and thats that. no life for the weekdays, but hello life for the weekends. but still, the 2 days of off day, do not seem enough.

I have a job now,(b4 this kan unemployed) which I'm learning to like.(trying hard to accept the fact that i'm a teacher,huh.suka tak suka kena accept the fact that you're a teacher,kan?).Nothing interesting, but I will let you know once I close some million dollars deals.haha :D and yes, i do miss my student life. susahkan rupanya dah besar nie, dah berkarier, segala bagai. but everything will be okay, pray hard.

So, for now.

Every single thing is almost perfect.

And my writing is back.

Hello!

p/s-no eye candy at school, boringlah gak:P

.because you're worth it.

2011-03-07T23:47:00.000+08:00

pics taken from stylecovered

my hijab is my identity, my responsibility, my fashion statement.
it is my will, my choice, my voice.
it does not undermine me, nor does it oppress me.
it makes me stand out, rather than stepped on.
it is not a punishment for being a woman.
my hijab is my honour, my pride, my right.

Happy Women's Day.(belated!)
know what you're worth!
<3

Ya Allah, tetapkanlah Imanku.

..........

2011-03-05T00:04:00.001+08:00

"Made a wrong turn, once or twice
Dug my way out, blood and fire
Bad decisions, that's alright
Welcome to my silly life
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated
Look, I'm still around"

=D

2011-02-14T21:41:00.003+08:00

i'll wake up every morning with the taught that something wonderful is about to happen.

school has been great so far. evening session. i'm teaching year 3. 32 hours in a week, 4 classes. one of the classes is the last class. it's a bit of a challenge when most of the kids can't even read and write. i think it is impossible, especially in the IT era. but it is possible. they are slow learners, i know i'll be a great challenge to teach them, but not gonna give up. i'll do my very best to help the kids. owh, i'm also a class teacher. have to start decorating the class, since dah keluar arahan from the administrative people, ASAP!any ideas how to decorate the classroom to make it child friendly, fun and enjoyable classroom?ideas is much appreciated!

the school is so big. 4 tingkat, weyh. buy the time sampai class on the fourth floor, i think i've lost half of my energy. plus with the heels, you tend to be more tirend,kan?

pray hard that my first year of teaching will be the BEST years of my life. and i hope yours will too.

goodbye uni years, hello reality

2011-02-06T19:10:00.003+08:00

Tomorrow I will begin my new journey .A journey to reality. Good luck to me and my fellow ipbarians .they say All good things must come to an end and so must our great journey.j ourney nak dapatkan segulung ijazah. 5 tahun setengah weyh. Bittersweet memories. I hope, our future will be great!

Thanks everyone for the memories -sweet or painful-, for all the assignments and the lesson plans shared. I am thankful for everything-good or bad things that happened. I'll treasure this long-and-meaningful friendship.

Personally to me, having friends like you guys are the best thing in my life. Everyone can see it but only me can feel its warmth. Thanks for being part of my life.

This goes to all Cohort 4 too and to those who have been cheering up my undergraduate life for the past 5 and a half wonderful (and struggling, of course) years.
Sorry if I have not been a good friend, a bad influence or a lame cohort mate to you. Forgive me for my bad words,my wrong doings, for being a terrible listener, for bringing such annoyance to the table, for being a troublemaker etc2.

Goodbyes are not forever though. Goodbyes are not the end. They simply means "I'll miss you" until we meet again. Heh.

Farewell ! God knows when we shall meet again eh?

p/s: Where's the "good" in goodbye anyway?

.lagu-lagu berkumandang.

2011-01-19T00:59:00.005+08:00

The songs that have been on repeat on my real player:

1. Love, love, love by Hope ft Jason Mraz. Love the song. Heard it on E news and I fall in love with the song instantly. This song is my favorite. I think Jason Mraz has the most angelic voice and not to mention a great body*drools*teringat his concert that I went to when I was in Brisbane. memories!

2. Marry Me by Train. Love the song. I recommend it to my dearest Nisah Lullaby I Love the song, and I’m sure you will too. You love "Soul Sister" kan?:D, btw, IMY, Nisah.

3. Who is by Bruno Mars. Love, love, love the song. Gosh! Why is Bruno Mars so damn good? I love all his songs. i hope he will keep making great songs in the future. Congratulations Bruno Mars, I’m officially your no. 1 fan.

4. For the first time by The Script. I dedicate this song for Ain . Btw, IMY, too Ain. You love the song “The man who can be moved”, kan? Try listen to this song pulak.:D

5. All about him by Auburn. This song is a bit cathchy. Ada a rap lagi. Nice song. For you people, who might have never heard of Auburn before, try to listen to her song, “Perfect Two”, one of my favorite!

6. Right through me by Nicki Minaj. I don’t really like her fashion sense. A bit like Gaga, but less weird than Gaga, but her songs are superb!

7. Like we used to by A rocket to the moon.

Okay, so, these are the songs that I've been listening to currently. Love,love,love is my favorite. It might be my favorite 2011 song, who knows. But it still cannot top my 2010 favorite song. None other than, “Just the way you are”. When I have a boyfie, I’m gonna ask him to play this song for me. Hahha, when lah?

saya nak posting!

2011-01-03T01:32:00.010+08:00

due to holidays that is tooo long, i managed to catch up with loads of tv series.mmg best weyh, duduk depan tv and just flicks through the channels. but when you get too much of tv, you can go weng-weng and plus the weigh gained.here's the list:

america's next top model cycle 15
e news asia
e news
the biggest loser (S6)
the biggest loser (S7)
mtv hits
ncis (s5)
criminal minds (s3)
Lie to me (S2)
Bones (S5)
Csi miami
CSI
CSI New York
Ugly Betty(S4)
Canada's next top model(finished)
Australia's next top model(finished)
Britain's next top model

and the list goes on.
come on kpm, give me my job ASAP before i die coz of too much tv!
let see, what else i have done during the holidays/unemployment?
online, play sims.sampai dah banyak family dah, family Damon & Elena pun ada. tido and zero exercise. konon nak kurus this holidays, but,BOO!i can't get myself up in the morning and go jogging to the park behind my house.morning x ramai orang especially weekdays, baru less rasa malu.weekdays there are so many people.haha, i'm fat and i'm so malu to exercise!:(

so please KPM, give me my job ASAP!
own, and i want purajaya please!pretty please.fuhh, demand seyh, let see mana i'll be tercampak.waiting patiently and sangat nervous.

those who hd received their posting letter!congrats, and happy packing.soon, it'll be my turn!

part 1

2010-12-31T17:00:00.000+08:00

It’s the end of the 2010; fortunately it’s not yet the end of the world (God-willing). New Year is here but there’s nothing new about New Year when we talk about growing old. Scrap that, I mean, growing up.

Unlike the good charm 2011 may offer, there’s nothing charming about being another year older. The future seems to offer dread, emotional stress and blissful denial to every living human being in his/her early-twenties. That is, of course, if you are the sort to freak out about being another year older, like I am.

Sure, I – in my early twenties, okay, suku abad kira early twenties gak kan? Have started worrying about wrinkles, deym. Serieously, dekat mata nie, I can see a few lines, especially when I laughs. And I believe that for a lot of us, it is not the growing old that we fear, but growing up (okay, I’m gonna be honest here, I’m scared of both).

Growing up is definitely not fun when it comes to being an adult especially being a responsible one. Of course, becoming a selfish adult would be the preferred choice to many when our time and wealth are not obligatory bound to other people (i.e. parents, spouse & family). That way, every possible personal desire such as luxury cars, high rise condos, ridiculously expensive gadgets and excessive overseas trips can be simply realized without sense of guilt of running away from increasing commitments as we grow older year by year. But in reality, whether we like it or not, we are defined as adults by our age, which increases over time. And by adults, I mean the responsible ones. As we speak, we’re aging and adulthood is something that we certainly can’t avoid.

Accepting adulthood means accepting responsibility and commitments. The question is, when is the time you know you’ve become an adult? Being a girl, I’m pretty sure we had somehow become so serious, grumpy & matured at very early age, but to guys, really, when is the right time they consider themselves adults? Is it when they hit puberty or when they turned 18? (which is the lawful age you are allowed access to almost everything in this country) or is it soon after they got married? I don’t know, and quite possibly you don’t as well. Or is becoming an adult something that we can decide on? If it is, when is the right time then?

2011, I’ll be teaching (insyallah, in god knows where. So, yes, I have: to like it or not to grow up, coz I’ll be alone with no friends that I’ve gone through my degree with for the past 5 ½ years. Back to basic, making new friends, get to know them, make wise decisions on your own, yada,yada,yada. Just like 5 ½ years ago. Susahkan?

Whatever it is, happy new year everyone!

I hope 2011 will be kinder, and better.

Good luck in growing old, erm I mean growing up!!!

And goodbye 2010.

.you can count on me.

2010-12-07T16:13:00.002+08:00

Salam Maal Hijrah everyone.

Well, after magrib pray last night, I googled about Maal Hijrah and what it meant. I found out that it was about reflecting on what have we done for the past years, our mistakes, etc. It’s like a paradigm shift from all the negativity in us to positive ones. And one thing for sure, Maal Hijrah is about starting a new leaf. Plus, I also read an article that stated we should remember the wrong things we did to someone but we must forget the wrong things people did to us. In other words, we must seek forgiveness and also we must forgive. Well, the article also stated all the benefits of forgiveness and disadvantages of holding grudges.

When you forgive, you're doing yourself a big favor. Forgiving people makes you less stressful and make you a much happier person. I mean, I know all these before, but I still hold grudges against people and look at me. Stressful even without my PMS and sad. When we say sorry and seek for others forgiveness, we have to really mean it. Before this, I’m the type of person who believes that “I forgive but I will never forget”, just because I want to protect myself from being hurt again. But, it brought me nowhere. Instead, I can never go on with my life and I’d be the one who ended up hurt more that before, because I hold grudges to people who have hurt me. And I too lost a few friends that I cared and loved because of that. It’s sad, every once in a while, when I see them happy with their life, with new friends way better than I am, it only brought tears to my eyes, and I regret every single thing that I have done to them. If only I can turn back time. So people, please, “forgive and forget”, and that’s what I’m gonna practice from now on.

So, I forgive the people who have hurt me and I seek the forgiveness from the people who I have hurt especially I seek forgiveness from myself.

So, have a glorious journey ahead of you and a wonderful new year.

I just want to be a better person, daughter, sister, partner and friend every day.

Hopefully, this year is going to be a better year than ever.

ama 2010

2010-11-26T02:29:00.010+08:00

watched the repeat of AMA 2010.
thanks for giving me reason to listen and put all the BSB's song on my playlist for well, some time.
they're the best boy band ever.
"As long as you love me" is their first song that i memorized.
well, proud to say the first english song i memorized.:D

these days, bukan zaman2 boy band. but it's beiber fever, etc.
gosh, you know your all "grown" up when you started listening to the boy band songs all over again and teringat zaman2 when you were so obsessed with all the boy bandSSS.
you collect their posterlah, beli majalah lime and galaxie just because you wanted the posters and sometimes their new songs lyrics(tat time, google, was not very popular, hence magazines are the source of their lyrics).
the good old days, kan?
=(
p/s-holidays sangat menggemukkan!

.baru2.

2010-11-24T19:51:00.006+08:00

remember i said that i want to start fresh.
well, i've started by cutting my hair.
lately rasa panas sangat and rambut x healthy.so, the best way is just to cut it short.
i went to a hair academy, it cost me Rm 8, for wash and hair cutting. oklah, i'm satisfied with the result too.
even mum had her hair cut.
so, introducing me and my new hair:

*plz dunt mind the photo quality, it was taken using a web cam*

Hello world!
how do you like my new hair?
till then,
bye-bye gorgeous ppl!

:(

2010-11-21T15:30:00.000+08:00

i don’t push myself, even though i know i can do 100 times better. i have much more potential to be a greater person, but i just don’t try.
not to sound cocky, but i know i’m smarter than a lot of the people who get better grades than me. i’m just not smart when it comes down to getting shit done.
such a bad habit. i could be doing so much better in school and college, and i could feel much better as a person if i just really tried.
But hey, what’s past is past.
I’m gonna start fresh.
Clean slate.
Well, good luck to you and me.
:D

.ten things i hate about me.

2010-11-14T16:19:00.006+08:00

the tittle refers to a book i had just finish reading by Randa Abdel-Fattah.She was the author of "does my head look big in this?". "ten things i hate about me' is her second book, and i am going to continue reading her third book after this. It feels so good to finally have a chance to lie down on your bed, curling up in your blanket and just read a good book. plus, with hot coffee on your side desk. when you are so into engrossed in reading, your surrounding become oblivious. it's like, for that period while you are reading, you completely ignore the surrounding. well, you know what they say, ignorance is a bliss. this is indeed true. in fact, very true.

i've a perfect way to spend my one month holidays, before being posted by reading books. i went to a book fair last friday, and i bought 6 books.i have 3 more books in line to read at home. i think that should cover my one month holidays, right? it's good way to disconnect yourself sometimes from your surrounding, from people, from everything and just read a book. trust me, you need it once in a while. to gain well, in my case, my sanity and myself back.:D
so, back to the book that i have finished, there are a few things that i think i can relate myself to the character. here is one of it:

" It's easier to think the worst of people,. you become a martyr to yourself.A victim of your assumptions. There's no no need to build relationship with others when you have such low expectations. But it leaves you alone. And i'm tired of being alone."

i sometimes think the very worst of people and myself, and i know i have to really change it quick. i am indeed just plus minus a month left to the reality, to the real world.
note to self: Think The very BEST of people. so, i guess i'll disappear for a while. i need to find the BEST in me first, so i can find the BEST in you!
Till we meet again.

.=).

2010-10-25T13:11:00.003+08:00

i watched Dato' Dr Sheik Muzaffar's and Datin Dr. Haslina wedding video(so lambat, i know!)
and yes, I'm green with envy. who wouldn't be?:P
the wedding was so sweet.
it brought tears to my eyes.
they looked so perfect together.
i like Datin Dr. Haslina, she looked so sweet(well, she has a sweet looking face) and modest in the video.
owh, love the baju nikah!
so, to the astronaut's couple:
may you will live happily ever after.
Insyallah!

.this is cute, too cute!!.

2010-10-22T15:45:00.003+08:00

we live in a globalization era.
everything is within a click,
even LOVE.
love this song.
been putting this song on repeat!
enjoy it!

here's the lyrics:

If I could google to find a way
To help me say that I like you
I’d go yahoo make you my boo
Within a day or two

If I messaged, would you read it
Tweet it would you see it
Cause I can’t say it to your face
If I post it up on aim
Would it be the same?
Oh well, here goes nothin’

Chorus:
I’m gonna poke you ‘cause I miss you
Like you cause I do
Reblog everything that reminds me of you
I hope you get the hint
And if you don’t get it yet
I’m tryna say I like you the use of the internet

This is my internet love song (x2)
Doo bee doo bee doo
w w w. i like you

You wouldn’t be forever alone
If you were down to get with me (smiley face)
LOL, JK, NVM
What do I really wanna say?

LOL lots of love
GTG got to get you
SMH for me’s you stole my heart
I know that that was cheesy
But what do you expect
If it comes from the heart, it don’t gotta be correct

CHORUS

(Tiki)
I can’t even express how I feel
www.this is real
So I log in just to aim you
But you ain’t online, forreal?
So I upload a song on YouTube
Dedicate it to you boo
I hope you listen ‘cause this song is just for you
Google I’m feelin’ lucky
So can you answer this?
I’ll formspring her under Mr. Annonymous
Tweet her 143 I miss you, I love you
What did I miss?
Here’s my internet love song
FaceBook status this.

it's so adorable kan?
:D

.i don't wanna listen, but they were talking too freaking loud.

2010-10-14T23:59:00.001+08:00

There are always stories about a hero running away with a heroin.

Always.

Why can't they tell stories about the person who got left behind.

I guess;

Extras will not be the center of the attention.

Extras are not the ones in the spotlight.

Even in Life.

.somehow, i miss this bald man.

2010-10-05T20:39:00.003+08:00

i love beautiful quotes.
well, here's a quote for today.

"Maybe it’s not just meant to be and maybe it for the better, or maybe deep down, you’re trying to convince yourself".

thank you for actually telling one good thing about me.
=)

what was i thinking?

2010-09-20T22:46:00.000+08:00

Friends come and go in our life.

And we cant blame them for leaving;

As we leave some of our friends too.

Don't deny it.

For whatever reason, we do.

And thats life.

We move on.

Whether with something being said or not, it matters not.

For if it's not meant to be, it's not meant to be.

raya,raya 2.

2010-09-15T17:17:00.005+08:00

the fact that i have to go back to school for prac really is a raya mood killer,man!
ugh!why owh why they freaking have school on friday?i mean it's just a day school then it's weekend again.haish.seriously,

I.NEED.MOTIVATION.TO.GO.TO.SCHOOL.

owh n yeah, i have not done any lesson plan for the 5 observations i'm gonna have when school reopens.haish.speaking of "productive" holidays!:((
enough whining about going to school.so and guess what i have been doing this holidays?

besides from eating non-stop(mum said that i have a "labuh pipi,which indicates that i've gained weight!)i have been watching movies, and tv series.i've finished pretty little liars in ONE FREAKING DAY! if you haven't already been watching pretty little liars, i really suggest that you do. it's kinda the perfect combination of everything but i think i appreciate the intense mystery of it all.

owh,Mr. Fizt, is so hawt,kan?

and i do think the "fitzaria" thing is kinda cute but if it really happens in real life, i think it's a little weird/awkward/inappropriate.

p/s-i'm currently watching cougar town, and zero lesson plan.don't we just love holidays???:D

raya,raya!

2010-09-09T17:00:00.003+08:00

Dearest friends,

ramadhan has leave us, and let's welcome Hari Raya!

i learned a lot throughout this ramadhan, and to change for the better!

i hope you are too!

I hope you can find the forgiveness in your heart this coming Syawal.

And you actually forgive me.

So, Selamat Hari Raya! Please drive carefully and be safe. Eat and be merry. Just please don't count your calorie, it's Raya, we have to eat, it's like mandatory! :D

And hopefully God will give us another chance to go through another Ramadhan next year. :)

InsyaAllah, Amin.

.esok cuti merdeka.

2010-08-30T23:38:00.004+08:00

my life these days revolves around practicum. yeah, endless lesson planning, observations, activity sekolah, yada,yada,yada, the l.ist goes on.
but heck, not gonna complaint.just a few more weeks and it's all gonna be over.
i LOVE school. like seriously. i.LOVE. SCHOOL.
not gonna elaborate. but yeah, i.LOVE.SCHOOL. enough said.there i've said it again.

today i feel so proud, very the rasa sense of accomplishment.
me and Umai, we trained like 12 year 5 kids for independence day pantomime performance. and yeah, we pulled it off together.everyone enjoyed it.
we did our own scripts, we did our own props, we trained the kids, we taught the kids how to act kat every scenes, and to read the text with correct intonation. FUH, yeah LOADS of work.but we managed to pull it all together. the pantomime, according to a friend of mine, was a great success, and the other kids and the teachers LOVED it!
yay!we did it!

ok, so gonna sleep sambil rasa bangga yang teramat sangat dalam diri.
heheh.
congrats to us!!!and i'm so proud of the kids too. gonna give them something as a token of appreciation.

meanwhile, njoy the song. this is the song that i've been listening to these days!

esok cuti, so selamat hari merdeka GORGEOUS peeps!:D

..........

2010-08-25T09:01:00.003+08:00

this is the BEST entry from a favorite blogger of mine.
such an eye opener.

"When you reach a certain age and point in life, there’s one thing that often occupies one’s mind. If you haven’t guessed it already, uh huh, it’s the thoughts on marriage.

It’s hard not to, don’t you think? When the radio is constantly playing songs about love, romance and sex…when movies, magazine and novels are all about love, romance and sex. Need we mention about our friends who are of our age (or maybe even younger!) who are already hitched and with kids. The sad truth is that we often fail and crumble miserably when bombarded by peer pressure. Inda tetap pendirian? Mungkin.

Here’s a tweet that I think is worth sharing..especially for those who are actively seeking for love. There is something bigger and far more important than looking for a boy (or girl!) soleh or otherwise.

Jodoh adalah Rahsia Allah. Jika menyibukkan diri dgn hal jodoh, maka itu adalah perkara yg sia-sia kerana tidak yakin dgn Qada-qadar Allah. Tidak yakin makna tidak beriman, nauzubillah. Usah di fikirkan kerana jodoh akan datang tanpa di undang. Tetapi dengan syarat. Hendaklah mencintai Allah dulu, dengan sebenar-benar cinta. Dan jika Allah mencintai mu kembali, itu adalah nikmat yg paling besar dari Nya.kdg2 Allah melambatkan jodoh kita kerana Dia tahu, apabil kita sudah berkawin, kita akan jauh dari Nya.Gunakanlah masa ‘single’ mu utk mendekati Allah, kerana engkau akan disibukkan setelah kamu berumah tangga. Rugilah manusia yg sering berfikir bagaimana mencari jodoh, tetapi bukan bagaiman memanfaatkan masa terluang utk mendekati Allah. Sia-sia lah Allah memberi kamu masa.

Have a read through the tafseer of surah Al Asr. May that shed some light as to what is actually worth our efforts, energy and brain juice."

=D

.=).

2010-08-23T19:58:00.004+08:00

7th week of prac n i'm on break!!!!woot!woot!
the kids are having their exams, so, means no lesson planning,cum no OBSERVATION!yeeha!
but still have 4 more observations from co-operating teacher and 2 more from my supervisor.
my supervisor's gonna observe me this friday,. but hey, i still have time,aight?
it's only MONDAY!:P
so, i've can berjoli sekejap, i promise only today!
tomorrow, gonna start cracking my head for more intersting lessonS!
so, anyhoos, been browsing through my collections of movies n drama series. n yeah tis is the BEST ep of GLEE that i LOVE.

i'm still waiting!=P

.madness.

2010-06-16T17:59:00.009+08:00

She's SUPER hot!
i'm currently listening to all her songs!
i like Fight for this love and Parachute the most!
owh, n here's the MV from her song, PARACHUTE!
njoy, GORGEOUS people!

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down
the guy yg dancing tuh, nmpk cam Leonardo Dicaprio,kan?

.currently watching.

2010-06-16T17:21:00.002+08:00

“Don’t ever tell me I don’t understand.”
— Dear John -

i LOVE Channing Tatum!

.3 weeks holidays.

2010-06-13T18:58:00.004+08:00

Lately I have been taking more milk and more fruits (banana and green apple to be precise).mom has been asking me to eat banana everyday, coz she read in a newspaper not long time ago, its good.lower your stress level, yada,yada,yada.fine for me, i love bananas. and i ate green apple with salt. instead of asam boi i ate it with salt. u guys should try it! it taste masam masin. yummy!
so, yeah, I guess this is just some like phase I am going through.watching the biggest loser really inspires me!
I am trying to be healthier - the key word here is TRYING.
t-r-y-i-n-g is a good work, right?
acctually, in this 3 weeks holidays, my aim, is to shed a few kilos, but i think its only harapan tinggal harapan.
Ehehe~
Had alot of things on my mind today whilst I mopped the floors and cleaned the house
but I ain't got the time to write them all down.
Wanted to go out and hang out with my sister but...she's in Langkawi.but she'll be coming home tomorrow, yahoooo n wth chocolateSSS!now u understand why i can't lose weight?:P
anyways, b4 the holidays, i was not in my "normal" condition.have some issues, but hope it'll be okay when i get back for my prac end of this month.i'm nervous.practicum is scary!hope i'll survive!pray for me, will you?
so yea, till nxt time.
toodles, GORGEOUS people!

“Anyone can become angry—that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way—this is not easy.”
-Aristotle-
=)

.long hiatus.

2010-05-26T02:11:00.000+08:00

six years is a long time; long enough to get to know a stranger, become friends, fall in and out of love, and love grows to hate, and eventually you lose all of the aforementioned feeling altogether.

some people say when we hate, we still care.

some say that the opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. then some also say that the opposite of hate is also indifference.

if that's true, then i am a very bad friend.

.rain owh rain.

2010-04-27T15:40:00.002+08:00

I love the rain. It is probably one of my favorite things. I love the smells right after the rain. I love the sound of rain. I even love it when it thunders real loud .. instantly brings a smile to my face. When it rains .. I usually sit at my window .. just so I can smell .. feel .. touch the rain.
Today it rained.. which officially marks the onset of the monsoon season. I am soo excited ! ! !
i noe, i'm supposed to be studying, but it rained today.
perfect for sleeping.
maybe i should study next tyme?
:D
Hope everyone is having a pleasant day...

Smile .. our first sem in IPBA,its almost over. :D

p/s-i've been listening to this guy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEioAlTVIJU

please2, i wanna guy like tis!

again, and again.

2010-04-15T00:05:00.002+08:00

we attach ourselves too closely to people sometimes and when they are gone, a part of us is gone too.

anyways,one thing i've learned,attaching yourself with people can be a nice thing. but not when they end up leaving you.

.of green teaS & assignmentS

2010-03-28T15:37:00.002+08:00

Women are very competitive with each other. Much more so than men. It's all about the competition. It is also a flourish to feel better than someone else. Maybe that's when the insecurities kick in; seeing someone prettier than herself; someone who has more money and better clothes, or maybe the fact that someone is dating her dream boy. This is probably typical for many girls and young women.

I'll be the first to admit that I am extremely competitive with other women ( in fact, there's few women in particular) and it's an attribute of myself that I am actively trying to minimize. The mere presence of another woman made me doubt myself and feel as if I had to compete with her in many way. I'm not proud of any of it, but, shits happen and let's just say I did this to myself.

Sometimes married men or boyfriends don't understand why their wives/girlfriends get so dressed up for parties or work/class or just to go shopping. Well, guys- she's not doing it to attract other men! Maybe she wants to look good in front of you. But, chances are, she's doing it for the other women. Shocking, but true.

When I was in the beginning of my university year and getting dressed in the morning, I wasn't thinking about how the guys would perceive me. I wanted to make sure I was viewed as "cool" an accepted by the other girls. Now, I dress the way I do mainly to feel good about myself.

So, ladies, who then, do we have on our side? Who are our true friends? Certainly not each other. And certainly not men. Sure, we all have our best girl friends, but, there are also some real bitches out there who likes/want to compete with us. I myself not sure i might be able to stop, can we expect she do the same? I'm confuse.

Sometimes I can't work out if you're a friend who wants to talk to me or an enemy who wants to take from me.

.i'm glee-ing.

2010-03-19T16:11:00.003+08:00

Okay. I have to admit something.

I have always been fascinated by anything musical. I mean good music. I won’t lie, I love songs and I love watching musicals.citer yg dancing2 pun i like.

yes, I am hooked on Glee.i've watched Glee when i was in Brisbane, but keep missing the shows, and now thanks to a friend, i gotta see the whole season 1.woot!woot!

and Yes, the leading guy in Glee isn’t the best of singers but the girl is!. I just love how they make a story out of outcasts in school. I’m sure at some points in our life we have felt like an outcast too. I was nowhere in popular group at school and even now, so I could relate to the idea of being criticized and have low self esteem.

I love Glee because they sing songs that I know, like, and songs from musical too (as I have mentioned, I love musicals), in contrast to HSM where they sing their own songs (okay, more original) but not favorable to me. Some people might say aren’t you too old for these stuff? Well, music never ages so I still think it’s still okay to drool over people talents (and good looks). Some of the casts are older than me so it’s still a green light to have crush on them!like the teacher, for instance,YUMMY!:P

Everyone has their own favorite series (be it Friends, How I Met Your Mother, House etc) and for me I might find one and as corny as people might say it (again, in defense, Glee is a sarcastic and dark humor comedy too!), Glee is the perfect fit for me (for the moment).dunt get me wrong, i LOVE, no in fact i'm the biggest fan of GOSSIP GIRL, ONE TREE HILL, and series that fall into the same category as GG n OTH.
can't wait for new season of GG!but, meanwhile, gonna enjoy GLEE.

I hope they keep the good songs coming!

P/S: Sometimes, you just want to break free and breathe a little.

it's not like i blog about something important.that's just fine.

2010-03-06T10:56:00.002+08:00

i came across this,
“When I say, “I love you,” it’s not because I want you or because I can’t have you. It has nothing to do with me. I love what you are, what you do, how you try. I’ve seen your kindness and your strength. I’ve seen the best and the worst of you. And I understand with perfect clarity exactly what you are.”
— Joss Whedon

and i couldn't agree more.

alone/lonely

2010-02-18T01:41:00.004+08:00

there are days when you feel that you've had enough of people, and you just want to be alone.away from those people, away from everything.

as for me, i don't know since when did i start to enjoy being alone(i think its started when when i was in OZ).being alone, i feel free, i'm curious, i'm excited and i get this sense of accomplishment at times. like i've discovered things about myself that i never knew existed and things that i never knew i was capable of. sometimes i feel proud, and if i could i would tell the world, "look, i did this all by myself" along with the proudest smile one can give.

don't get me wrong, being alone is in no way equal to being lonely.

sometimes you're in a place full of people, most of them people that you know, yet you still feel hollow.and alone, and you just feel empty.like all people you've known suddenly become strangers. or you could be sitting at a cafe, sipping coffee alone but still feel complete.

i know the feeling of both.

you know, although i love the freedom of doing things at my own terms but sometimes, it feels good to ask for permissions, or at least tell someone or someone asking where i'm going or what i'm up to. it makes me feel as though somebody actually cares. which explains why on certain occasions i ask my mom to wake me up in the morning although i could've easily use an alarm clock.

i think being lonely isn't about going out alone, but it is actually when you come home and nobody even realize that you were away the whole time. that's just heartbreaking. sometimes you wonder how much time it would take for people to start looking for you when you went missing.

well, maybe i should try to dissapear and see how many people actually care.

.you.

2010-01-16T22:00:00.006+08:00

i guess what my dear friend used to tell me 2 years ago is true.
"kita takut nanti, kita tak rapat dengan orang yang kita used to rapat dulu".
being apart, it taught us everything.
it's sad.
things are not the same anymore.
maybe it's just me.
it's so hard to talk to you these days.
so, i keep everything to myself.
i miss all the timeS we had together!
:(

.my first post of 2010.

2010-01-09T19:21:00.001+08:00

This is my first post for the year 2010. how time flies,kan?
Just finished my orientation week. Just finished my orientation week .TOTAL ABSURDITY. Such a waste of my 3 precious days. But, not gonna talk about it. And YES, Woot, Woot, I’m a final year students. Such a waste of my 3 days. But heck, it’s ok, at least we got to see the new Timbalan pengarah, n I like her.she's oklah. Final year students equals to High expectation. we are gonna be super busy!hish, sapa kata jadi cikgu senang? Fear, adrenaline rush, mixed feelings to get through this year. Hopefully less drama, less gossiping session (heh) and a smooth journey to reach the end of the road. But I know life is no fairy tale. But I hope I can get through the year by being less ignorant and more optimistic towards life. Plus, have to tone down my think-too-much attitude because it’s simply tiring to me and others. maybe I should just leave it in god’s hand. But I have to plan, then only I can leave it to god. Plus plus, I really really want a final year trip to anywhere(holidays I mean) by the end of my university years. Anyone to organize? =).pretty please.

.welcome 2010.

2009-12-31T16:22:00.003+08:00

can you believe?today is actually the last day of the year 2009.
a lot has happened in the year of 2009.
bitter sweet memories.
gonna delete all the bad memories and start fresh for 2010.
i thought this picture really suit one of the sweetest memories that i have of 2009.
end of year and the new beginnings!
i guess i'll see you again in 2010!

i hope everyone has a greaaaaaaat new year's celebration!

anyways, this is a short post. i am physically really tired. not enough sleep, i guess :(

be safe,peeps!
:D

.ok, patut stop.

2009-12-08T10:51:00.002+08:00

Yer, for the kegilion timeS, i should keep reminding myself to STOP eating!
makan2 memang seronok.
owh, yer ini post pertama saya setelah kembali ke tanah tumpah darah terchenta.
i miss brisbane already.
shyte, i don't wanna be back for good.:(
anyhoos, i've been jalan2, makan2, bagi2 souvenirs, tgk tv (citer nenek kebaya baru habis yer,kawan2,but idk what's the cerita about).
yer, umah saya tiada astro, so, saya menonton cerita2 di national tv sahaja, n OMG!sanagt lambat yer, kalau di oz, sangat advance, sebagai contoh, cerita bones, owh saya rasa sudah season yang paling latest di oz.di sini masih season lama.
n for the kegilion times too, i should not compare here n Oz!Stop2!
ok, mahu breakfast!
kalau rajin saya akan pergi swimming di um.so, see u all there,
kalau x, saya pasti di rumah menonton tv sambil mulut tidak henti2 mengunyah.

p's-jangan terkejut apabila berjumpa saya, obviously saya makin tembam.
:(

.selamat hari raya aidiladha.

2009-11-27T21:20:00.000+08:00

Selamat Hari Raya Aidiladha. what sacrifices have you made? i honestly have no idea what i've sacrificed on my part. i feel so selfish, for wanting too much and putting myself at the center of my world. le sigh.

@__@

2009-11-07T08:30:00.002+08:00

i woke up, checked my facebook, n my dear friend has updated his tubmlr.
i personally like this entry o his:

“ She has her days when she feels like breaking down and crying until her eyes hurt because she feels like everything is falling apart and there isn’t one thing she can do about. Like she has no say whether or not her life goes well. She gets mad easily, and she over thinks all the time. What ifs often get her into trouble; and make the situation worse, but she’s never going to stop thinking them. She may not be the prettiest or the most popular girl in the world, but she’s okay with that. She’s okay that she may not be the smartest or the funniest either. She understands that sometimes she has to fall in order to see if she can get back up and move on, and she’s okay with that. She understands that she can’t always get her way, even though she wishes that wasn’t always the case. She knows that guys are stupid, but that doesn’t make her love them any less. And she realizes that friends will sometimes stab you in the back which means that they aren’t friends, and you need to push them out of your life. Life isn’t an easy ride. There are ups and downs, twists and turns, but in the end, she smiles and tells herself that it’s alright.

.i love us.

2009-11-06T17:18:00.004+08:00

"Sometimes you have to be strong for yourself. You have to know that you are a good person and a good friend. What is meant to be will end up good and what is not won’t. Relationships are worth fighting for, but sometimes you can’t be the only one fighting. At time, people need to fight for you. If they don’t, you must move on and realize what you gave them was more than they were willing to give you. Hopefully, people realize great things when they come around and don’t lose something real. Always fight, until you can’t anymore, and then be fought for"

.ho-yeah!.

2009-11-05T13:06:00.003+08:00

Yay! Wuhuu! Woot! Woot! I have all the reasons in the world to do cartwheel around my room now(but frst i have to kemas dululah, coz, there are books everywhere!) And the biggest one is, I have finished with my studies in QUT. Done. Over. Period. Yay!

I submitted my last assignment this morning. Alhamdulillah. I hope the result will turn out great. pray hard.Amin.

I can't believe it is all wrapped up now. The part that I will miss the most is here. just having the opportunity to study overseas.i'm so gonna miss QUT.seriously i'm leaving Brisbane in 25 days, and man, i hate it!i LOVE it here.

the closer i am to going back, i dont feel anything. i'm not even excited.yes, i miss my family and all, but, after 1 year and 10 months being here on your on, without your family,but only yourself and some friends, really taught me a lot of things.bitter sweet memories!:D

Well. I have tons of things to do, including vacation and trips to enywhere possible.

I can't wait to go out and see the world.

The world is my playground now. Yay!

.i'm ugly, YES.

2009-10-29T19:21:00.003+08:00

i was in the midst of finishing my maths portfolio (it's due tomorrow, fyi) when this question came to my mind.

which is easier - to feel sad for other people's sadness, or to feel happy for other people's happiness?

kawan semasa senang, kawan semasa susah.

i'm happy if you're happy. really?

sometimes when happy things happen to others, we would always say "i'm happy for u", but do you really mean it?

i took little time to ponder before i decide on my answer: it's easier for me to feel sad for people's sadness.

true, it's impossible to really put yourself in someone else's shoes and feel exactly the burden and suffering he/she is feeling, but the least we can do is feel sorry.

but being happy upon seeing other people's happy moment- i have to admit that i honestly cannot remember the last time i felt that way. at least not in my heart, though i might have said it out of custom.

i said it too many times but i just can't help but imagine that it could've been me instead in that picture, smiling.

i know, it's all been planned by Him, and we all have our parts of fortunes in different proportions and at different times and they can manifest themselves in the most unexpected ways.. but it's easier to be forgetful, no?

i am one jealous person. sometimes my jealousy eats me up from inside and i become this horrible, horrible, horrible angry person.

and yes, i can be very UGLY sometimes.

please, help me remind myself that despite everything, i still have it all.

thank You.

p/s- that question just don't came to me, somethings happened, and yeah, it was ugly.so, to be continued.:D
p.p/s-i have an exam this monday, and i have not start studying yet, coz i have two more assignments due, so, yeah, please, please pray hard for me.i really need it!

.a little LOVE can make a BIG difference.

2009-10-27T21:58:00.001+08:00

Lately when I look into the mirror, I am not sure who I see and at more often than not, I don't even recognize the person that stares back at me. Lately there seems to be a need for me to prove myself... that I am worth something... that I have a reason for living and that I was born to do something great, something...anything... Lately I seem to be living more often in my own little dream world... perhaps it is only there that I live the life that I really want and where all my dreams are a reality.

I am reminded each day of the changes that are taking place around me. The things that we can control and the things that we have no power over and I am left puzzled and pissed of because I hate not being in control of things. Then there are the things that you do that on the spur of the moment and you wonder for the upteenth time why you did the things that you did, why you said the things that you did... and you wonder and ponder as hard as you can and make up all kind of hypothetical reasonings in your mind.

I am not sure where my ramblings are taking me today. I just felt the need to write about the consequences of ones actions and the consequences of everything that happens. After each act is done and finished and after each sylablle is uttered... there are so many consequences that you have to deal with that at times I just want to sit in this little hole in some God forsaken place and never need to be a part of this gigantic chain of consequences.

I did some things which I am not too proud of awhile back(and i already regret every seconds of it) and at times when I am alone and when I stare at that face in the mirror, I wonder what I have become and momentarily I hate myself... but the moment evaporates as suddenly as it comes and I am left being me... that me with the imperfections, the me with the sometimes shitty life, the me who tries to fill up the gaps of her empty life, the me who loves and who longs to be loved in return and the me who knows that the day will come when she will only be but a memory...

.congrats.

2009-10-11T19:46:00.006+08:00

congrats to nadirah hanim mannan and her fiance!
*pic from her facebook*

she was my best friend when i was in primary school.
i can still remember, when my friends asked me, "who is ur best friend?"
without doubt,i would answer it's her.
i've known her since i was in standard two.you see, apart from my sister, she was the one i'm close with.
we are still friends when we were in high school, until form 3.
when she got an offer to the MRSM,we lost contact.
we got back in touch when i was in matriculation.
and Alhamdulillah, we are still friends till now, though we may not be the very best of friends, but we are still friends, and that's all that matters.
hope we will still be friends in years to come.

Seeing people getting engaged(another phase before marriage), revives some kind of hidden feelings buried inside me.
=)

.pretty please.

2009-10-10T17:11:00.004+08:00

pic from a movie, "Love Actually"

to my dearest friend,
just don't care about what people think of you,
you know yourself better, and you have tons of friends to support you.
most importantly, you have that someone by your side(jeles2,unlike me,kan?)
so, don't be afraid to be who you are.

p/s-someone please give me a placard with a message like this!i want jugak!
=)

.this is the easiest thing to do in life.

2009-10-07T18:01:00.002+08:00

It really is true, hurting people you love the most is, sometimes, the easiest thing to do.

Don't ask me why.

Probably because there's a 99.99% chance or even a 100% chance that they will always be there, no matter what, no matter how much you hurt them or push them away, they stick around.

And this is when you start to take people for granted.

Because you know, no matter what you do, they will always be there, when in fact, they won't always be there.

We should all learn not to take people or things for granted.

Because, we, ourselves, don't want to be taken for granted.

.vow.

2009-09-16T14:03:00.002+08:00

i promise to LOVE you, even when you have hurt me.
i promise to LOVE you, even when we're mad at each other.

you know y?
because it's easier to be mad at people you trust,
because you know they'll always LOVE you no matter what.

p/s-the pep talk, it helps, REALLY.

.i don't noe, ini pantun berapa kerat.

2009-09-10T19:20:00.003+08:00

if you run away
should i chase after you?
Or should wait for you to come back?

if you're adamant about your silence
should i talk to you anyway?
Or wait ‘till you talk to me?

if you hurt me
should i forgive and forget?
Or should I hurt you back?

if you are gone
really, should i miss you?
Or is that for the best?

You can't get it all, have it all.

Sebab ini dunia, bukan syurga.

:(

2009-09-08T12:58:00.002+08:00

So far, I dont find myself obliged to anything..which is a good thing..because if I do…then I wont get to be myself. Sepi. Yes, indeed this word has more meanings than u can ever imagine. At times, I do feel alone. But I have started to realize what I really am inside. Sometimes, I do feel like being alone. I dislike being in the middle of everything and being used like a door mat. I hate it when I have a lot of high expectations out of my friends, but when they’re not, I get mad. You see the thing is about friends, is that, you always want to see a little bit of yourself in them. Yes, if they do, you’re damn lucky. But if they’re not…well that’s reality and you just have to accept it the way it is.

When you started to post emo’s status on facebook or YM, than only people started to notice. Asking what’s wrong, and all, and tha’s when they started to be sensitive, to start care about you. Am I touched? heck no! coz, why do you have to post some emo status on facebook, that you, who called yourself a friend started to notice. Puhlease! Owh, wait, I forgot After all, everybody’s human right? And not just u who can get hurt, other people can get hurt too, ever heard of that? Well, that’s life. And people can be so insensitive sometimes.

so, I just keep to myself. And bottled up everything. But because this has been such a habit, I am just left like that. It kind of feels like you are not being appreciated and your existence does not make any difference. I tell myself, this is life. Its true, when you feel so alone and you’re in trouble, people don’t want you. And so to make yourself pop out, you have to go hoo-haa and make yourself seen. Fuck. So I have to pretend? I don’t think I can pretend to do that for long. At this point of time, I don’t really want to be what I’m not. And I can’t live my life trying to impress everybody. That’s so fake. So I reckoned that you just got to be yourself, and if people don’t see you, that’s too bad. The fact is, people see what THEY want to see in you.

P/s- I think it’s the PMS. so don't mind me.

......

2009-09-06T20:33:00.003+08:00

after all that happened, i hope everything will be better than before.
but i was wrong.
so today, i've learned that,
i should have never put my hopes high on anything, ever.
period.
and i'm tired.

salam ramadhan

2009-08-23T12:21:00.004+08:00

hope it's not too late to wish everyone of you Salam Ramadhan Al-Mubarak 1430H! Maaf Zahir Batin.

Have a blessed one and hope all of us will find barakah and peace during the month. It is the best month for us to be better Muslims.my last year of puasa in brisbane, sedih and happy as well,coz it means Malaysia is just a few months away.i have plans to accomplish this ramadhan.insyallah, i'll try my best to accomplish it So, hope you guys will accomplish all your plans as well. I also do hope that I'll manage to do my last-minute shopping before the Hari Raya comes!i want a new "raya" shoes. hehe. So, marilah perbanyakkan amal ibadat and set your priorities right, ok!

Happy puasa once again!

=)

.while you were sleeping.

2009-08-18T22:48:00.003+08:00

i think i was 11 years old when i first watched the movie.
if i'm not mistaken it was aired on ntv7.
what can i say about the movie?
i LOVE it!
it's a GREAT movie.
i have been telling everyone how much i loved the movie.
sadly, no one(well, people that i've told) knows about the movie.
except Sarah.
10 mins ago, i was watching the movie, and i cried.
it is STILL a great movie, and GREAT movie never fails to make me cry!
yup, i did cry.
think after this i'm gonna have a good sleep and sweet dreams.
coz, who noes, maybe while i'm sleeping, i'll find my prince charming!
:P

goodnight GORGEOUS people!

.happy birthday Nabilah!

2009-08-14T16:35:00.006+08:00

My Dear Nabilah,
You magnify my happiness
When I am feeling glad;
You help to heal my injured heart
Whenever I am sad.
You were there whenever i need you,
you're my shoulder to cry on,
You’re such a pleasure in my life;
I hope that you can see
How meaningful your friendship is;
I'm so grateful to have you in my life.
Happy Birthday!!
I LOVE u always, Nab!
We've known each other for 6 years, and i hope we'll be friends for FOREVER!
Thank you for putting up with me all these years!

.my 101 post!.

2009-08-01T22:22:00.000+08:00

In my many years living on this planet earth, I have done my part in hurting other people and I have played the part of being the hurt one.

Just in case you still don't know, both parts hurt. Like hell.

And as usual, to mend things, we all would apologize. I have apologized and received apologies as well.

And the thing that I have learnt is this, when you have apologized, you leave it that way. Let the universe takes over and does whatever that needs to be done. You have done your part. So, stop at it.

And just please, don't make up excuses for your sorry. We all know we apologize because we have hurt someone. We all know that. No excuses needed. We already know.

And another thing is, don't make up excuses so that your apologies will be accepted on the spot. Just don't. In case you're wondering, it takes time to accept apologies. As much time as the time needed to apologize (sincerely) to someone.

So, when you have said your apologies. Just leave it that way.

If we have hurt someone, no amount of apologies can un-hurt that someone. So, leave him/her to heal on their own.

They will heal. Time will tell.

You just have to wait.

But, never ever to leave them alone!

P/s- the last sentence is really important!

.3 minggu tanpa entri baru.

2009-07-29T16:23:00.007+08:00

The title says it all. It's not like I don't want to write, it's more like, there's so many to write to a point I have no idea how to start.
So, anyways, let’s start with my new sem. class have started for a bout two weeks
I have been busy with stuff, well mainly thinking through what to take for this sem, since the government decided that there will be no more science/ICT and maths in English,
So that means, we are no longer “force” to take any maths and science/ICT subject.
And my choices of subjects for this sem are wider, but yet, it was so hard to choose what to take.
Anyways, unlike last time, for this sem, we are only allowed to choose 2 electives.
For one of the electives, there’ll be an exam.haish, x palah, as a preparation, coz when we're back to IPBA, we all have to sit for examS!but good news is, I only have class on Monday and Thursday!Yay!hari lain, I’m thinking of working!kerja, datanglah!saya sangat perlukan duit!*sighS*
So, here are the list of subjectS I’m taking this sem:

1.Teaching reading and writing.*that’s right*u do need special skills to be able to teach reading and writing.this is the subject that has exam. and I have to get GOOD result, xpecially after I have bought the super expensive book!*there goes my moh-ney*
2.resources, design and evaluation for EFL*I LOVE the lecturer*she’s like a mother to everyone of us here.
3.Comparative curriculum study.*our TESOL coordinator*I teaching us the subject, she’s SUPER lovely.but this is the subject that I’m a bit lost!
4.Excursions in mathematical reasoning*that’s right*though we are no longer required to take an maths or science/ICT subjects, I’m very much interested in this subject.according to the lecturer,he doesn’t want us to find the answer for the maths questions, but to make sure we are able to reason out how you go about to get the answers.plus the tute is very hands-on. We all feels like kids, when we are in the tute!

Listing those subjects down, they are all not bad when u come to think of it.those subjects come with superbly wonderful and helpful lecturers, and loads of assignments, and exam(my least fave part, but that’s ok!i’m sure I’m gonna do GREAT, right?)
Pray for me will u?
Well, I need to buck up, as my last sem’s result was a bit disappointing!=(
But, heck!
I’ll do great this time, right?
Hopefully!
Amin
And yeah, this is my last sem in Oz,Gosh!how time flies,kan?
In less that 5 months, I’ll be in MALAYSIA!
Yay!
I can smell MALAYSIA, dah!
Can u?
Toodles GORGEOUS people!

what’s wrong?

2009-07-02T21:07:00.000+08:00

have you ever felt…
sad but couldn’t tell why?
like crying but couldn’t shed a tear?
happy but couldn’t sparkle your eyes?
like screaming but couldn’t hear your voice?
emotional but couldn’t get a hold on it?
like letting go but couldn’t feel what you’re gripping on?
lost but couldn’t find a sign?
like running but couldn’t see the finish line?
left behind but couldn’t pick up the trail?
like catching up but couldn’t reach a hand to hold?
excited but couldn’t share with anyone?
like celebrating but couldn’t find a company?
have you ever felt stupid but couldn’t blame yourself?
have you ever felt there’s something wrong somewhere but couldn’t figure out what?
Well, that’s what I’m feeling right now.

.how i spent my winter hols.

2009-06-27T18:17:00.006+08:00

so, yeah, i'm in my winter hols, and just lazing around.
lazy to go out, coz, it's gonna cost moh-ney.
maybe one of the days, i'll go out to watch transformers.
i cannot not watch it right,coz people said it's awesome!
so, yeah...
I used up my Internet 100 gb during off-peak hour, which is from 12.59 am till 12.59 pm to watch movies on youtube, and to download songs.
so, let see, this morning, i've watched KAMI the movie!
loved it.
i did some research, and the producer said that the budget to make the movie was under 1 million, and yet they can still produce a quality movie!
thumbs up..
so, anyways, i'm not gonna talk about the movie, i think by now, many of u have watched the movie(yeah, i'm so terlambat).
i just wanna share, how ALI, really cam serupa ngan nicholas saputra, kan?
owh, i LOVE them!

serupakan?
angkat tangan jika anda setuju dengan saya.
i have to be super-duper nice to anis syahirah, coz she said her brother in law knows ALI.
maybe anis'll ask her brother in law to introduce him to me!
bolehkan, anis?
:P

.ada apa dengan dslr.

2009-06-26T12:42:00.005+08:00

sekarang nie, pergi mana2, semua orang pakai dslr.
sampai buletin utama di tv3 juga ada menyiarkan pasal dslr.
trend zaman sekarang, trend zaman anak2 muda zaman sekarang.
dulu hip-hop dancelah, shuffle lah, etc. skang nie dslr lak.
many of my friends are also a user.
but me?heheh...i'm only a model.:P
tumpang2 kawan2 yang ada dslr.
seriously, i never really understand why dslr?
y not just use the normal digital camera?
according to some people, it's the effect that dslr can do that can make photos nmpk sangat cantik.
what about adobe photoshop,etc?it can't gives u the same effect ker?
hmm...like i said, i dunt noe, coz, i'm only a model, not a user...
and a few days ago, i called faz, and she said my brother is showing some interest in buying dslr...
she said he is the "tukang amik gambar" in his school, so, that's why, he's like so interested in dslr.
so, he's just waiting for me to come back and ask me to donate some money for him to buy dslr.
well, if he's buying dslr, looks like my career(eh, x boleh blah, perasan siot), as a model, will never end. i'm so gonna ask him to take loads of my pics.(well, only if i have money to donate).but b4 that, kn kurus dulu, baru gambar2 taken by dslr akan nampak lebih cantek...
:P

.an entry from auckland.

2009-06-18T20:27:00.007+08:00

i'm suppose to go to sleep, but yet, this article is really interesting indeed.

try clicking it here

what i think,
kalau kau dah benci seseorang tuh, buatlah apa pun, memang tak boleh blah..
ada jer benda nak kutuk pasal orang tuh.
though sumtimes, the people that we really hate, had done nothing pun to us,
or sometimes, how little-est things that someone we hate did, can really bug us...
and we wanted to find the person's flaws.judging everything the person does.

even the no. 7 tip: remember happy shared experience,i dunt think it works.
but quoted from a friend,"it helps"(R,2009).
how it helps, idk...

sometimes, i wonder, what happen to forgive and forget?
obviously, i'm not fan of "forget-ness".
so, only time will tell, kan?

meanwhile, buat tak tau sudah!

daa GORGEOUS people!

.esok saya akan ke New Zealand.

2009-06-11T18:38:00.003+08:00

i love quotes, they're inspiring if we can find a way to relate ourselves to it. sometimes when i hear good lines in a movie or stumble upon a sentence i like in a book i'll write them down somewhere.

anyway, here's a quote for today:

"Sometimes in life there really are bonds formed that can never be broken. Sometimes you really can find that one person who will stand by you no matter what. Maybe you'll find it in a spouse and celebrate it with your dream wedding, but there’s also the chance that the one person you can count on for a lifetime, the one person who knows you sometimes better than you know yourself is the same person who's been standing beside you all along".
(Bride wars, 2009)
life would be wonderful,if we can find someone who'll stand by you no matter what?

.Away.

2009-06-04T07:35:00.002+08:00

I will be away to SYDNEY from today till 10th June.
Then back to Brissy, And the next day, i'm off to New Zealand.
Back to back holidays...
there goes all my moh-ney!
But what the heck, i'll sure gonna have a lot of fun...

till then,

toodles GORGEOUS people.

.i really can't wait.

2009-06-01T17:49:00.008+08:00

the NEW MOON trailer is here!!!
OMG, can't wait to watch thw movie...
the trailer looks good though,
i can't believe Taylor Lautner is acctually 17..
he really bulked up for this movie...
sexy-mexy weh dia dlm trailer tuh,
but no!!!
i'm so in love with Edward.
haish, kenapalah ada orang cam edward (rob patz), nie...he's sooooooo hot!!!

u can watch the trailer here

Off-task from my assignments: Faded , drifted

2009-05-31T18:54:00.001+08:00

Sometimes I think it'd be great to be someone else. I wanna live somewhere else, the other part of the world. I feel as if what I already have just isn't enough. I feel like what I'm going through is just different - and I don't think I even like it. I wanna be normal, just like everyone else. I feel really empty, as if there's nothing else to live for. Maybe I’ve been fbook-ing too much. Seeing how other people are enjoying their life, having fun with their friends, etc.

I cry silently at night wondering what's missing in my life. I miss the past, and wonder if I can ever turn back time. I wish I could change every mistake I've done. Most of the time when I'm online at night, I wonder what everyone is doing. I see how others are living their lives. I wish I could be in their shoes. When I see pictures, I can't help but be happy for other people's happiness. I wanna be as happy too. Why can't I? I can only sigh and watch from afar.

Asal I tak macam tu? Asal I macam ni? Asal hidup I cam dull habis?

I sometimes lose my self-worth. I feel like a total loser at times, most of the time to be honest.

There's always someone better, and I can only envy.
There's only someone happier, and I can only watch.

Maybe I'm just drifting away from YOU.
Mungkin nur keimanan makin pudar.
Save me, God.

Is it true that, “every cloud has its silver lining?
And that’s why my life is like this?



.owh, saya menggelabah sudah.

2009-05-29T16:20:00.000+08:00

Bangun pagi, gosok gigi, pergi mandi. Buka laptop, check email sekejep, face-booking sekejep. Selepas itu, mula Duduk di hadapan laptop bersedia untuk membuat assignment. Berjam-jam duduk di hadapan laptop, masih tiada idea yang keluar. Waktu tengah hari, makan. Lepas makan, rasa mengatuk, pergi mandi sekali lagi.lepas mandi, buat secawan kopi. Rasa mengantuk hilang. Duduk di hadapan laptop lagi, sambil memainkan lagu2 kegemaran di “winamp”. Masih tiada idea untuk membuat assignment.
Malam tiba, assignment masih tiada yang dibuat.
Hari ku habis di hadapan laptop, tanpa berbuat apa-apa. hari yang sungguh tidak produktif.

Nice, and I’m flying off to Sydney this Thursday.
3 assignments and I’m so dead.

Sudah mula menggelabah.
I’m freaking out!

God please give me ideas to do my assignments.

.i like.

2009-05-23T19:25:00.001+08:00

Currently, I’m reading Daddy-long-legs by Jean Webster.
Thanks to Nora who gave the book to me as a birthday present.
I’ve been searching for the book all my life.
There was a cartoon adapted from the book, that’s how I came across the novel.
It was my favourite cartoon other (sailormoon pun kalah).
Have u guys ever watched it?
It was on tv2 before, way before astro was “invented’.
It was during primary school, if I’m not mistaken I was 9 years old that time.
I can still remember, faz didn’t turned up for an interview (to be a librarian), just to watched the final of “Daddy-long-legs”.

So, anyways, the story is about a trustee of the John Grier orphanage has offered to send Judy Abbot to college. The only requirements are that she must write to him every month, and that she can never know who he is. She doesn’t even know his name. The only thing that she knows about him is, he’s tall, he’s rich and he hates girls. She writes to him every month (more letters than a month!), about her college life, classes, and a growing friendship with the handsome Jervis Pendleton.
I love the novel.
One of my favourite classical novels.
I recommend it to all of u…
I almost finish reading it, I can’t put it down…
Tak sedar assignment banyak..

There are just three things that I know:
1) You are tall
2) You are rich
3) You hate girls

I suppose I might call you Dear Mr. Girl-Hater, Only that’s sort of insulting to me. Or Dear Mr Rich-Man, but that’s insulting to you, as though money were the only important thing about you. Besides, being rich is such a very external quality. Maybe you won’t stay rich all your life, lots of very clever man get smashed up in Wall Street. But at lest you will stay tall all your life! So, I’ve decided to call you Dear Daddy-Long-Legs.

That’s how she came out with the name.
The extract is very interesting, right?
So, go grab a copy of it...
Best sangat…

I’ve read almost a quarter of the book, gonna continue reading it after this.

Toodles, GORGEOUS people!

.The aftermath.

2009-05-22T08:36:00.000+08:00

Yesterday night was fantastic. Awesome.

I was “kidnapped” the whole day by Sarah. And when I got home, there, I was greeted with many familiar, GORGEOUS faces and the next thing I knew, they were singing the birthday song for me.

Thank you, gorgeous people.

Thank you for the very best of friends (you know who you are)

I didn't know how you guys pulled the conspiracy off, but you just did, wonderfully, I have to add.

To deserve all these things and these GORGEOUS people on my birthday (well, a day after my birthday), I must have done something terribly good.

And for the awesome 23nd birthday, surrounded by loved ones, thank you God.

Alhamdulillah.

Thank you very much for all of your wishes, and the pressies. I was overwhelmed and I felt loved. I have to say this year's is the most wonderful one I have ever had.

Thank you for making it wonderful, terrific, fantastic and lovely.

Just thank you.

I have said this many many times, but I have to say it again.

To deserve wonderful things and people on my birthday, I must have done something terribly good. I must have.

So, thank you GORGEOUS people. God bless you all.

And I love you all, especially the very best of friends!

Xoxo

p/s- will upload wif the pics later.

.happy birthday Nur Fazilah Othman.

2009-05-21T07:53:00.003+08:00

Especially for Nur Fazilah Othman.
Dearest Sis,
Happy Birthday To You!
I thought of the times we had fun together
I thought of the times we fought each other
I thought of the times we cried and laugh together
And i realized how much i Miss you.
May Allah always be with you.
XOXO

.happy birthday rifah!

2009-05-17T19:17:00.003+08:00

My dear Arifah,
Happy Birthday!
May all your wish come true.
I thought of the times we had fun together.
I thought of the times we laugh together.
May HIS blessings always be with you.
Sayang kamu!

xoxo,
Fad

.fad tengah layan lagu nie.

2009-05-17T16:26:00.004+08:00

Terlanjur Cinta
Rossa feat Pasha (Ungu)

(Rossa)
Waktu bergulir
Lambat merantai langkah perjalanan kita
Berjuta cerita terukir dalam
Menjadi sebuah dilema

Mengertikah engkau
Perasaanku tak terhapuskan

(Pasha)
Malam menangis
Tetes embun membasahi mata hatiku
Mencoba bertahan di atas puing-puing
Cinta yang tlah rapuh

Apa yang ku genggam
Tak mudah untuk aku lepaskan

(Korus)
Aku terlanjur cinta kepadamu
Dan tlah kuberikan seluruh hatiku
Tapi mengapa baru kini kau pertanyakan cintaku

Aku pun tak mengerti yang terjadi
Apa salah dan kurangku padamu
Kini terlambat sudah untuk dipersalahkan
Karna sekali cinta, aku tetap cinta….

(Rossa)
Mencoba bertahan di atas puing-puing
Cinta yang tlah rapuh

(Pasha)
Apa yang ku genggam
Tak mudah untuk aku lepaskan…

bestkan liriknya?
layan2...
=)

.owh,so random 2.

2009-05-16T20:12:00.002+08:00

I’ve been coughing, and whenever I cough, my chest hurts.
Alhamdulillah, I’ve recovered from fever.
The cough won’t stop, once it started.
The cold weather is making it worst, and especially in the morning.
The cough mixture I’m taking doesn’t really help.
And one thing hat I like about having this cough is, I had an extension for my oral presentation. Yuhoo.
Only for 1 assignment. But that’s ok.

Hopefully, this cough will stop soon.
I need a full speed recovery again to get ready for the oral presentation.
Pray for me,ok?

toodles.

.owh,so random.

2009-05-14T15:05:00.000+08:00

I am sick. My immune system has gone wrong somewhere because I am not someone who gets sick easily.

I hate that when I am sick all things need to be put on hold.

I have tons of work need to be done.

2 oral presentation, next monday & tuesdAY.

I need a super full speed recovery.

Amin.

.happy birthday nisah!

2009-05-12T17:51:00.005+08:00

My Dear Nurul Hanisah Norizan,
Happy Birthday!
I'm so glad to have you in my life.
I hope that you can see
How meaningful your friendship is;
You’re a total joy to me.
May His blessings always be with you.
May all your wish come true.
Love ya lots.
Happy Birthday again!

xoxo,
Fad.

.May babies.

2009-05-08T15:14:00.005+08:00

kami adalah May babies...

*dari kiri: Rifah, Fad, Nisah*

OMG, we're growing old!
saja mau kasi hint.

p/s- nisah, rifah, mintak izin kasi promote...=)

.yehaa.

2009-05-06T08:41:00.007+08:00

maaflah, saya nie mmg lambat skit.
baca blog nisah br tau tomok menang oiam.

I'm sure most of you would've known that this season's winner is Tomok Shah Indrawan, the former lead singer of New Boyz. Being part of the band, wasn't exactly his crowning moments in the industry, so winning OIAM 3 is in fact a step up in his career.

I must say, when I first heard that he was going to be part of the competition several months back, I was skeptical, perhaps the whole nation was. Never did I thought that he'll seize the RM1 million prize. But as the show unfolds, he showed an improved version of himself, Tomok v2.0! FAR better image, powerful performances (though he wasn't exactly the best singer there is), an all-round improvement!

Therefore, all there is left to say is that I wish him the very best in his future undertakings and CONGRATULATIONS for being the winner of the OIAM 3!

p/s-u can read more here.
owh, i've watched the grand finale, best ok.i think i even like him better than faizal tahir(yuck!)
lagu "rindu terhenti" pun not bad.

bila assignment di-extend kan

2009-05-06T08:31:00.003+08:00

Everyone is full of expectations, especially about other people. And I too, have full expectations on people. And one of the famous expectations is, we expect that we can rely on people that are supposed to be reliable. Okay, that sounds confusing.

Pendek cerita, kita berharap yang orang boleh diharap pada masa-masa tertentu.

And we put so many expectations on these people, we forget that putting high expectations will usually leave us frustrated and hurt. Really. What do you expect, we are humans. We don't meet each other's expectations. We fail people sometimes, well, most of the times, especially when times get hard.

When we build things together, for example, a relationship, a friendship, a community, we expect to go through thick and thin together. We will always hold hands, through happy times and through the bad times. And we don't bail out when things are hard. We don't just abandoned whatever we have built and leave, just because it is sinking. What if people leave you when things get hard? Or what if people abandon the things you built together just because it's rocky?

It sure hurts, doesn't it?

So, before really deciding to abandon things, think about the good times and also all your hard work to make things work. If you leave, every thing will just go down the drain and whatever you have worked for, will vanish, just before your eyes. And that is just sad.

I may have no guts to say the thing I’ve should say, to do whatever to make things even clearer and better, but at least I’m not embarrassed or scared to ask people what I should do. that’s a start at least. And I’ve learned loads of things. I don't want to be known for someone who abandons things when times get hard. and I don’t want to live in regret for the rest of my life. every thing can be worked on. Every thing has a way to be resolved. We just have to find that way. It will be painful and long, but sharing the burden together, will definitely lighten the load everyone carries.

i'm praying hard, so that everything will be better.even better than before.

.lalala 2.

2009-05-03T11:20:00.004+08:00

These few days, my health and my mood are taking roller coaster rides. Okay one moment, the next moment, poof. I feel like slapping myself for not being able to be in control of the situations. But even the strongest person has his/her weak moments, let alone me, who isn't the strongest person, obviously.

And I have 2 assignments to submit this coming week,Field-studies and action research. and i haven't started yet.omg!i better start doing my assignment.insyallah, i'll finish it on time.

So, I am using today to fix my mood so I can concentrate,with minimal distractions.

Have a superb Sunday!

bye!

.untitled.

2009-05-02T20:28:00.004+08:00

I really have this bad habit.
Whenever I’m mad at someone, I’ll have a “cold war” with the person.
I won’t talk to the person for quite sometime (until I cool myself down, which GOD knows when-sometime It’ll be only a day(min) or it’ll be for quite sumtyme).
It’s bad, I noe.
When you hurt/make me mad at you, and ask me,
“Are u mad at me?” I’ll say no.
But actually, I am mad.
When I reply “no”,
I’ll avoid eye contact, and TOTALLY ignore the person.
But actually, I’m holding back my tears.
I’m not someone who swears, yell, etc when I’m mad.
I’ll wait till I’m alone.
And when I’m alone, I cried and cried and cried…
And even cry myself to sleep.
And don’t ask me why I’m mad at you, coz, I’ll burst to tears.

Coz, i need tyme to let myself cool down first.
So when you sense somethingS that are wrong wif me (be quite all of a sudden).
Please take ur tyme to ask me whether I’m mad at u, or there’s sumthingS wrong if me.
And don’t apologize (not straight away), coz I’ll feel so guilty.
Though I noe it is universally acknowledge that, if u noe u’re wrong, apologise straight away.
But, it’s just doesn’t work wif me.
You have to let me cool myself down first.

Yeah, that’s my BAD HABIT.
I always do this whenever I’m mad at someone.
I feel guilty though, but I can’t do anything about it.
It’s in me.
It’s a really bad.
I noe, I’ve hurt so many people wif my stupid “cold war”,
Believe me; I don’t want it in me either.
If we call it“ability”, I would willingly want Sylar to take it away from me.
I’m an egoist, I admit that.
But I’m so sorry people, I can’t change it.

P/s- I noe, how do I expect people to noe what have they done to me, if I continue on with my “cold war”. Though I’m not mad anymore, if you asked what u had done to make u deserve such “treatment”, I’ll never say a word. it’s just things that I won’t talk about anymore. i’ll let it go, but I’ll never forget. coz, I dun’t wanna be hurt, guilty, etc anymore.

P/p/s- but to day, u’ve hurt me beyond repair, and I’m sorry coz things will never be the same again.

.ayah saya.

2009-04-25T20:38:00.004+08:00

from ebay & lelong.com to YM to emailS(yahoo,gmail) to friendster to skype to web-cam-ming and now into facebook!!!
ayah,ayah...adik sayang ayah.
adik rindu ayah...

.one in a million.

2009-04-24T09:36:00.005+08:00

I've watched tomok performed in one in a million.
and yeah, he's not bad...
i was NEVER a big fan of him.
i used to make fun of him dulu2 masa dia rambut belah tengah, lol
but now, look at him!
i admit, Tomok totally a different person.
no more sengau-ness...
just like what syafinaz said, "dah hilang sengau2 yang saya tak suka"
wow. now im choking on my own words.dulu x suka sangat. now, he's not bad.
like i said,he's a different person now...
thats a bold choice when he sings craz in love & Umberella,but not bad though,
he rock-ified (not sure if such word exist) it.
but, wassup, with da hair?
trying to be joe jonas?
NEVER in a million years!!!

p/s- i like the way paul moss pronounced "TOMOK"...sexy weh...

Post-Jason-Oh-So-Gorgeous-Mraz

2009-04-16T19:59:00.001+08:00

OMG!!!!!!!!!

I screamed like a teenager when he appeared on the stage.

He is sooooooo gorgeous. I never knew that before. Haha. Ironic.

Tapi he IS gorgeous. Dengan body dia. Haih. If i can drool, sure Brisbane convention centre dah banjir which is disgusting when you think about it. Haha.

Whatever.

He is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo gorgeous I want to have his babies.

Ouh, he is not just gorgeous but his voice, sumpah weh, boleh tak tidur malammmmm.

Haih. Kenapa ada orang macam dia nih? Gorgeous, awesome voice, great body.

I can die from just talking about him.

Jason Mraz, will you marry me?

p/s : sila baca entri ini dengan nada super duper excited. I think I am in love! Haha.

wait for the pics,it'll come soon, very soon.

na-nyte GORGEOUS ppl!

=)

Eating +cold weather = FAT!!!

2009-04-12T21:18:00.002+08:00

I think I need a MAJOR diet. Well, I have put on some more weights.
Berat yang tak pernah sampai sepanjang hidup selama 22 tahun ini.
sangat menakutkan.
=(

it’s weird though, I’m walking to class everyday, climbing up the very-steep-hill still I haven’t shed any kilos at all…WTH?
So, since nothing happens,
I’m trying to cut my food. But too little I guess. At this stage, I think I need something big. I need a MAJOR DIET and a major change in my life.

That is the thing I hate. I mean, I can't help it. I LOVE... to eat. It doesn’t matter, but I love to eat.It had been raining for the past days, and it’s so cold. So I eat a lot.i think by the time winter comes, i'll ballooning and, everyone will be so shock! AgH!! !

I wanted to go jogging, but I got hooked up wif “the sims” game and plus assignments (loads of it). And time too, is now a luxury for me.
In conclusion, Eating +cold weather = FAT!!!

Oh dear God, pls help me.

Please let me shed a few kilos.

I want my old weight back (walaupun tak seringan mana).

P/s- I’m addicted to “Jai Ho” song…and the video clip...
Nicole is so hot in the video. even hot-ter than aishwaria rai.
Go and watch the video clip. u’ll agree wif me

Have a gorgeous day peeps!

Tomorrow I’m having a surprise visit to my darling Amy’s house. We’re gonna celebrate her birthday!!!Happy 22nd birthday Amy…

Ta-ta
=)

.Growing old.

2009-04-04T13:49:00.002+08:00

Growing old makes me be lazy. I mean, I am a growing to be a very lazy person. Haih.

And I hate it that my room is a mess, my clothes are all over the floor, my wardrobe is very horrible(not organized), my study table is covered wif books, I have readings to do, and assignments are piling up, but still I’m procrastinating. ugh, I hate it…
Fadilah, kenapalah malas sangat.
And, yeah, I didn’t go to QUT MYSA agm / bbq today.
I’m so freaking lazy.
I just wanna stay at home, and hibernate all day…

I should have gone out. Maybe going out can bring me love. Maybe I should go shopping. Buy things. Haha. Maybe when I buy things, I’ll meet someone. Just like the green scarf Rebecca Bloomwood bought and wore when she met the oh-so-gorgeous Luke Brandon. Haha...

Or, maybe I should start doing my assignment, or maybe clean my room, or do something.

See, growing old, had made me so lazy. I will turn 23 next month (another 1 month and 17 days to be exact) and it's hard. Growing up is hard. Growing up comes with responsibilities. And I, for that matter, despise responsibilities.

Let's just enjoy my last moments of being 22 years old, though lambat lagi.

Owh, and let’s start be rajin lah, no more lazy-ness.

Have a fantastic weekend!